Happy Being Single

I'm single. And I'm happy. Why do people have such a hard time believing this? Well, not all people, but married people. I had a member of my ward tell me today that she had the "perfect" guy for me. She thinks we'd be great together. And do you know why we'd be great together? We're both single. Yep, that's right. It doesn't matter if we have the same interests, goals, ideas about marriage and children or if we're attracted to each other. Apparently, the only criteria for finding the perfect guy once you're over 30 is that you're both single. And here I've been wasting all this time looking for someone I could be happy with and love for all eternity. Silly me, I just need to pick the next random single guy I see and get that marriage license.

I've really been focusing lately on myself and it's been fantastic. I'm finding out more about myself, what I want out of life and what I want in a spouse. Of course I'd love to get married. But I'm not letting that desire take over my life. I refuse to let life pass me by while I sit and wait for Mr. Right to come along. I realize how much freedom I have right now and I plan on taking full advantage of that freedom. There's a lot to do and see in this amazing world and I intend on seeing all I can. So, dear readers who happen to be married, please know that it truly is possible to be single and happy. If you have a guy who is actually great for me for other reasons than just also being single, feel free to introduce us...if not, that's okay. I'm not crying myself to sleep every night.

I've also been thinking a lot lately about having kids. I'm not getting any younger and I know that I don't have much time left to have babies of my own. I'm okay with that...I was never one who wanted a huge family. I'd love to be able to be pregnant, but I'm also very interested in adoption. I have a few friends who have struggled with infertility and my heart aches for them. My heart also aches for me...I sometimes wonder if I'll ever get the chance to find out if I can have kids. But then, as I read some of my friends' blogs, part of me is kind of okay with not having kids. Doesn't that sound horrible (please don't judge me)? I wonder if this happens to other people that are single and "older". Am I too selfish to have kids? I love children and I know my friends love their children and wouldn't change anything, but I also see how much they sacrifice for their kids. No sleep, no time alone, no sleep, no freedom to do things they want, no sleep. And did I mention no sleep? I have many friends with kids and I can get my "kid fix" anytime I want. Then I can go home and take a nap. Or go see a movie. Or go to New York for the weekend. Is that enough for me? Some days I'm sure it is. Other days I'm not. I teach the 8-year-old class at church. There's one boy, Blake, who is my favorite. I know I shouldn't have favorites, but this kid is seriously hysterical. Last week we talked about how important it is to say thank you to people who do nice things for you. Like your parents, teachers, siblings, friends, etc. I gave them all a blank thank you card to write on and send to someone they wanted to thank. Blake gave his to me. My name was spelled incorrectly and he drew me a picture of a flying dragon. It was one of the best cards I've gotten in a long time. It was a tiny little taste of the rewards you get as a parent and I was hooked. I imagine that the pros outweigh the cons when it comes to having kids...it's just hard for me to imagine making such a drastic change in how I live my life. I guess that's why it's better to marry young...before you know what it's like to be single over 30 and get to be this selfish. :)

I had a great weekend...we went to Eastern Market on Saturday for a fantastic breakfast and some shopping. I found a killer bracelet. Saw a movie and went to a dinner party. Then today at church we found out that our stake is being reorganized with a new ward being added. Next week we all find out where we'll land. I'm pretty sad about this news. I love my ward, even though it's enormous and after almost three years here I'm finally feeling like a true part of this ward. Like I'm finally getting to know people well. I'm not excited about starting all over with new people in a new ward. I hate change, even though it's usually good for me. So I'm trying to have a good attitude. I kind of wish I could make a list of people I love and have that be my ward.

I have a busy week coming up...I hope everyone reading this blog is doing well. I miss you all! Come visit!